Title: I’m Not The Lonely One
Keywords: Emotional Hardcore, Melodic Hardcore, Post-Hardcore, Punk, Dark Hardcore, DIY, Screamo
Reviewer: Alex Spalding
Recently, our blog came under fire for a review that the inimitable KN wrote. Specifically, a review in which he used the term ‘girly’ to describe a noise that, for all we’ve been able to surmise in post, might not have possessed any traditionally defined gender stereotypes at all! Our crack team of sound specialists and concerned mothers have been working around the clock ever since, trying to uncover any genitalia the artist may have hidden within the music and, so far, this is all we’ve come up with:
As KN and I are both sylphs of the internet possessing no physical form and comprised solely of febreeze, 56k dial-up tones and occasional traces of bird feces, we often positively utilize gender-specific pronouns, adjectives, even conjunctions whenever applicable in our descriptions of music and sound. If something seems to fit or seems provocative for thought, we follow it to the very end. We sincerely apologize for any unintended harm this may have caused to you, our dear readers and sound artists, who so often accompany us on these musicological wanderings.
Anyway, all of this brings me to the review laying before me. It is for an album described as Emotional Hardcore. As we all have learned from the culturally entrenched institution of patriarchy that we have yet to dissolve, emotions are the sole domain of women. On the other foot, the term ‘hardcore’ denotes something “masculine”… making Emotional Hardcore (or “emo”, for short) something like… the Elohim of musical genres, if you will. Hermaphroditic.
The first track, titled ‘Acceptance Is Denial’, begins with some guitars… then there’s a floor tom, followed by the “hardcore” coupling of macho girly guitars and rhythms. After a melodic distorted section we hear the screamostyle vocals, like a hundred penisvaginas screaming in pain and agony. The track is actually very short and leads right into…
… ‘Denial Is Despondency’, starting with a screaming vocal thing and going into discordant guitar verses. It feels like man and woman becoming one in a blur of fleshy pink genitalia. It sounds like the vocalist is on the verge of manly tears, but possessing a feminine stoicism.
Next is ‘Despondency Is Unhappiness’, which goes in this sort of waltzy schmaltzy hardcore rock way. There are some intriguing noises in this track, actually; a kind of strange guitar noise that sounds really bent up.
‘Unhappiness Is Loneliness’ is next (is this an emo concept album or something?) kind of feels like much of the rest of the tracks on the album, very soft, mushy dudebro / hardgirl rockcore stuff.
Then, the finale, ‘I’m Not The Lonely One’, with melodic guitars at the beginning going into the familiar emostuff…
… um, here’s a link. This review has been brought to you by Gender Equality.