Artists: Flat Affect, &Others, Proud//Fathers
title: A First Time for Everything
cat: FSCD 08
keywords: experimental, avant-garde, free improvisation, noise, Panama City
label: Fora and Spoon Records http://facebook.com/forkandspoonrecords
Under the cover of this great artwork shoots out a thrilling combination of excessive flushes of sound diarrhea, in the prosperous combination of an award winning rash of wedding bells. Add in a whole arrangement of guest speakers and you will get a bit of an idea how the first track on this release sounds like. It’s noisy, chaotic and exciting; in fact a bit like a wedding day in which guests turn up that weren’t invited and a strong of a heavy breeze will lift up some of the party tents in the air for good fun.
The happiest day of our lives, ruined by participants, the weather and brown and yellow spots on what supposed to be a clean wedding dress. It might not have been a text book event of happiness, but it was definitely the first time to hear an event like this brought to the ears in this condition.
The second work sounds a bit as of it starts at our very first day together after (surprisingly) successfully exchanging the vowels and the wedding rings. The life as a married person wasn’t quite what was expected as the newlywed house seems to be placed in some kind of damp swamp and the kettle for our homely first cup of tea, has issues to flute properly.
There might be something wrong with the water boiler as the pipes begin to peep and stutter. In fact I’m not sure if it’s indeed the water boiler as it sounds more like a crunchy beast attempting to growl while munching on a guitar. It does sound as if the guitar is indeed delicious as the teeth clings into it as if it’s an appetizing crunchy snack. Perhaps the left over from a over burned self-made wedding cake? It sounds as if it is indeed a bit hard and the boiler monster cries out loud when it finds its teeth broken. My ears feel sorry for this little hungry boiler pet but I’m too busy covering my ears from a potential brain damaging scream of the creator.
The soundscape moves along and it’s nice to explore more of the newlywed house that doesn’t get rid of the swamp feeling. Did we marry a frog or a water spider? My ears aren’t sure who we have pretended to marry, but it must be someone eccentric and close to nature. Are there birds singing around through the rooms?
Let’s look in the cupboards for the very first time.. A voice seems to be trapped in there and it’s coming closer and closer. It’s frightening but the cupboard door is open and no way it’s going to close. A little needle drops and the place is silent. It’s a silence that mostly appears in horror movies in which something terrible would happen. The classic scare music starts indeed to do its thing and the first day of our marriage is quite the nightmare.
Was it an accidental marriage with a poltergeist? Pots, cups and unidentified stuff is being launched by itself. Little angry rats seems to enjoy nibbling on the toes and a girly high screams can be heard as if every step that the feet make are stepping on tiny tails of these little rascals.
Than a scene comes in which we can hear someone or something stirring in a glass pot with a spoon. Is there someone cooking food? Or is it again the poltergeist playing tricks on the mind? A noised up donkey makes its legendary sound and the stirring keeps going. Just when being close enough to view the happening, the unfortunate boiler monster returns. It has now demolished the guitar and pretends to be one by itself. High beeps shine in the eyes as a protective response and from here it takes a more relaxing attitude as it’s munching and licking its own fingers.
Slurp, sniff and gurgle it does and it becomes brilliantly clear that this strange boiler creature might be the girl on the front cover. Legs up and licking the fingers and showing off her (not so) private parts. She chomps and fingers herself like an octopus in Heath. Is this the one we have married or is this another surprise in this newlywed house of first time horrors? Bats fly out of her Venus temple and clouds of mind shredding comfort noise starts to penetrate the ears like a mist of poison.
This must be the end as electric shocks are applied to our just wedded body-parts and no help from a loving wife or husband to be seen. Dying on our first day of living the marriage life sounds nothing like expected, but it does sound perfect in time for the Halloween! So in that case YIKIS recommends this CDr featuring the content made by Flat Affect, &Others & Proud//Fathers.
Are you ready for a mysterious audio marriage of you and potential hell that needs your ears more than you need your ears for other purposes? Get the release from Fork and Spoon Records at the following kinky link: