Guard: Hey hey! What’s the secret password? Did you say ‘Boners for Bono?’ .. That is correct! Please continue…
<you are entering a virtual room, a headquarter with busy talking individuals in all corners. There are people preparing banners, leaflets, postcards and even stickers for the upcoming No More Bono demonstration>
Caelicus: hey buddy good to see you here! You are right on time for our weekly gathering of the minds in how to remove Bono from the past, the now and the future. I don’t know about you, but we had enough of this disgrace. Let’s get this monkey (me) out of its misery.
Mr. Doom: could you give me your hand? I’ve made some anti Bono buttons and have the feeling that you are the one right for the job to wear them.. That unless you are Bono undercover, that would be awkward haha..
<mister Doom pulls your hair to check if it’s a wig, and places a couple of buttons in your hand. They are round, featuring Bono’s face with a red line through it..>
Miss A: … I’ve never seen you here before, what brought you here? The communal hate for Bono? The urge to safe the planet and make a better world? What is your profession? Are you creative? I’m an artist, claying Bono faces from my own feces and sending them to fans, event owners and organizers and some random people who have his music on their Iphone…
Mark X: good to see some fresh faces around here, better than these fresh feces from Miss A that’s for sure.. How are you buddy? You know some of us made the news? It’s amazing how working together can do bring us closer to our mutual goal of getting rid of that big-got Bono.. Here take a look at this article and tell me you don’t feel proud to be a part of this movement?
Elisa: …And then now it’s time for a little introduction speech before our weekly screening of our club anthem. This week it’s Stephany Geraldo who is a struggling artist, singer songwriter and freelance kangaroo that has the honor to do so..
Stephany: Norwood Grimes expresses something that most of us sensitive music making souls are dealing with on a daily basis, struggles to survive in this difficult world while doing your own thing.. It isn’t easy to be true to yourself and your art if the whole world around you is based on fucked up stuff, capitalism and utter crappy bullshit. It doesn’t help to have bigots like Boner from U2, Kardashians, Paris Hiltons and other nobodies stuffing their faces with cash while you are a starving artist that nobody seems to be willing to invest in. It’s fucked up, and it sucks..
<the people in the room seems to agree>
Stephany: Norwood Grimes says it in this song, but we can nod unbiasedly in agreement that he makes good music..His song ‘I Hate Myself and Want Bono to Die’ is so recognizable, so identifiable.. It will be felt by any underground artist trying to keep their heads up.
<a giraffe sticks her head through the window and nobody notices it>
Stephany: Wouldn’t it be a huge relief to have this ‘icon’ of shit crucified so he could fulfil his save the world Jesus-syndrome by leaving the earth for our sins? He has already been chased out of town by German Anarchists who chanted the wonderful words ‘Make Bono History’, his band has already been the annoyance of every hipster with an iPhone, and even Henry Rollins has no love for this sunglasses wearing ** (insert the C word).
<Some people yell the C word>
Stephany: It’s no good to put hate posts out, but the frustration for some talented artists like Norwood Grimes (and many others) who actually have some realness in their guts and soul is simply hitting hard back home. Even Bono (who presents himself as the helper of the third world..) would feel this song in his heart (if he has one..)Wouldn’t the world be a better place if there was Norwood Grimes instead of Bono? Wouldn’t the world be a much better place, more creative, more real?
Stephany: And then now, just like every week we will stand up and watch and hear the adopted club anthem made by Norwood Grimes. Please rise of your seat, and please do sing along if you can: