Cyborgs on Crack – Microprocessed: 2012

Artist: Cyborgs on Crack
title: Microprocessed: 2012
keywords: electronic, trianglecore, saucerstep, pop, post-whatever, New York

Minced Thought’ marches in with a militant rattle over a stubborn baseline. I mean it won’t bend; it’s there until the end and will not move away. The military rattle can shoot all that it wants; it simply isn’t scared to stay. If that doesn’t make much sense to you, you probably never had the experience of having a minced thought yourself. Let this be the opportunity to have one, or semi relive one that is brought to you with great research until even greater perfection by nobody less than master genius Cyborgs on Crack.

Of course after the perfect ‘minced thought’ in audio and textual form this danceable album moves forward with a set that will even get the stiffest robots (even Data from Startrek) moving in a bleep blip fashion.  This is the solid responsibility of a tune named ‘Robot Driving A Sheep’ . It goes for such a locked groove and deep crunchy baseline that there isn’t even a need for oil to lube up the rusty parts. Get grooving, robots! I’m sure you will love to hear a good breakdown when you hear one and join the sheep at the instant mass cyborg rave.

^ a standard depiction of a selected group of cyborgs raving

^ a standard depiction of a selected group of cyborgs raving

Frightened about calmness’ is taking all the fears away by bringing a rhythmic producing cutlery machine in all it’s might and glory. Teacups and teaspoons, a little tip of a fork of acid and a repeated Punch and Judy clap to really get the happy slapping going. Of course to completely make this dopamine inducing soup complete Cyborg on Crack rolls this out on a effective three finger synth baseline and a collection of fine chattering chatters. If I wouldn’t have been dancing too much in my carton boxes robot suit I would have yelled : Bravo!

Then there is a track named ‘skip this song’ which is basically an attempt to trick you and me into skipping this ‘song’. But ha, as a true rebel I didn’t skip it and neither should you as this stuff is getting respectively groovy. There is something absolutely retro about it, something that brings up Casio keyboards and big power drums, but it also smells of a cyborg future: nifty and tight.

^ did this cyborg just farted?

^ did this cyborg just farted?

More fart electro and bitch slapping is making a sexy appearance with house keyboard that will make you want to pop some XTC (eXTreme Cyborgs) to really get the legs moving on this computer & robotic friendly excellent form of groovy trouble. This is ‘yoghurts Are 2012 Psychics Too’ and Cyborgs on Crack couldn’t name it better!

The ‘ogg’ track is really coming across as the military music of the futuristic retro future’s future. A place in which old school telephones are still dominating, and all army personnel had been replaced by super tight and willing Cyborgs who next to the urge to conquer also seem to be pretty much positively humored. There is no winning against this army as it turns its enemies into dancing lunatics.

^ nobody can beat this army of cyborgs

^ nobody can beat this army of cyborgs

I saw it with my own ears’ goes for this nice electronic flubber laser sound that gets cozy with a square electronic bass that begs for a silly move. I had to give in and was doing a move in which you have to shake one hip from left to right and step like a horse your legs up and down while turning your head around like an owl. The best thing would be to do this on top of a car, with someone inside it honking the car klaxon. Are we having a good time?

Then there is the resurrected ‘rejected song’, a work that feel as if it’s made for in the eighties club with some dude with mascara on singing about his totally fucked up haircut. Lyrics would maybe something like ‘I fucked my hair, shoe wax, fuck it, my hair is fucked’. Lyrics are not so important as the music speaks for itself; just get loaded on motor-oil, act like you have escaped from a asylum and feel that freaking rhythm of rejection.

Another eighties sounding piece of madness is a close family member of the previous rejected song & funny enough this song actually contains lyrics and a voice! The music is a lot of fun, making me think of a chair dance between clones of that singer from the cure. They run around, around in circles around one single chair until the music stops and they all fall over each-other. As you can imagine; it’s a lot of fun!

The ‘song for tetsu’ perfectly continues where the chair dance had left us behind. Here it’s a drummers only happening; perfectly inviting them to drum with fingers on the table to give this tune the extra punch of firework that might push us over the edge.

^ might this push us over the edge?

^ might this push us over the edge?

It’s time for remixes, and that is great as there are two of them! One is       ‘Frightened By Calmness (DJ Dick Deckard’s Android Love Mindfuck Dub) ‘which really seem to invite you to bring out your empty beer bottles and hit them with an object as funky as you can! And the other one is the super funky and sexy sounding ‘Yoghurts Are 2012 Psychics Too (Alex Spalding 2015 Lactic Galactic Mutation Mix)  . I don’t want to sound biased but it’s the best tune on the record, going for warm melodic progression and percussion that really goes for a psychedelic professionalism that is hard to sit still too! A great ending for a retro wink that is made for dancing and dancing they shall! Click here and engage:

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