Hello dear reader, I’m KN.
Welcome to the future… Ah, shit it’s already gone. Let’s try again; welcome in the future… Nope, it’s gone again.
When the future is just one millisecond away, it’s basically impossible to be in the future, we are doomed to be always in the present.
But don’t worry, I’m at a fortune teller’s tent who is armed with a glass bowl. Not just a upside down fish bowl; no, this is a magic bowl in which we can see the future. A perfect tool to be in the present, and still be able to take a look into the upcoming future. It’s not very interesting to check what will happen a few seconds into the future, but a couple of days ahead could be quite nice.
Fortune teller… what’s up in the future? Anything interesting to see? Some good fortune? Something interesting happening? Good health? Wealth? Sexual satisfaction?
Unanimous fortune teller: … I see… I see.. What you don’t see… And it’s in the future… It’s the future…
How does it look like, which year are we in? Where are we?
Unanimous fortune teller: … Let me see.. I see… I see a bowl in front of me… I see the future… I can see it… It’s getting clearer… Tillywood… The Netherlands… Dutch people.. Wooden shoes… Kroketten…
What is it? Do we win the lottery? A disaster on a global scale? What’s happening?
Unanimous fortune teller: … I see a party… Neon lights… Dead skulls… Green stuff glowing in the dark.. Mutilated barbies… Inedible food… Poisson… This place it’s dangerous…
Oh my goth the future sounds horrible, are we all gonna die? What’s up with the dead skulls & the mutilated Barbie dolls? Did they die from the food?
Unanimous fortune teller: … Drinks.. Poisoned.. Poisoned drinks and people drinking it…
Oh no.. Horrible…
Unanimous fortune teller: people making spastic movements, they move their body parts on loud noises… Someone puking on the toilet… People smoking… More ballistic movements…
Oh shit, what the hell is happening in the future?
Unanimous fortune teller: …ah I see it clearer now… Equipment… Instruments…
What? A mad dentist scientist killing and drugging people?
Unanimous fortune teller: it’s a party! It’s… Let me see… It’s a party named Gifgrond!
Unanimous fortune teller: gifgrond! Indeed! ..it’s 3 October.. 2015 .. A Saturday.. In the Netherlands…
but that’s this Saturday? How am I going to be there?
Unanimous fortune teller: let me see… Who is delivering the optimistic nostalgia? … Fetter will be there showing surreal animations and making electronic music with intimate vocals… Let me see… I see a link… Can you see it too?
Unanimous fortune teller: http://www.fetterpunkt.com/ oh and I see another one https://soundcloud.com/fetterpunkt/demands . Too bad I can only see the future and not hear it.. I’m just guessing that it’s intimate electronics with her voice as I can see her playing with electric devices and her mouth opening and closing… It’s a gift to see in the future.. It looks like the audience is mesmerized at it..
What about the skulls, the poison? Where am I in this story? Can you see me?
Unanimous fortune teller: hmm let me see deeper in this bowl… Hmm I see… I see… I see that guy from the Raaakalbomfulkerz but now he is Duke S. … Let me see what he is doing.. It’s hard to tell… Something with a parakeet.. It looks interesting.. Especially when you like parakeets… I can see… I see a link … https://soundcloud.com/toztizok/duke-s-hymne-aux-ailes-du-cr
Hmm… Okay and am I there? Where is my fortune?
Unanimous fortune teller: I see a person… Hmm…
Unanimous fortune teller: it’s a girl… Yep… I can see a girl..
Am I going for the transformation operation?
Unanimous fortune teller: no, no it isn’t you. It’s a girl with a korg groovebox.. I can see it clearly now… It’s Yva & The Toy George a one girl band from Rome.. Oh she is definitely doing something right in the future.. Too bad I’m not able to hear with my eyes but I can see the whole place grooving and dancing! It’s a wild party! Now the spastic moving body parts start to make sense… I see something else… It’s another link… how fortunate!
Hmm.. That super cool, I want to go there than.. Am I there? In the future? This is about me, right?
Unanimous fortune teller: hmm… I see… Let me see… I see a deejay… Deejay Alexa D!saster.. Definitely from Berlin… People go berserk .. I see a review in 3 for 12 praising it into the great skies of awesomeness… It’s a party you don’t want to miss…
So am I there?
Unanimous fortune teller: I couldn’t tell.. Too many moving body parts… Nah, I didn’t see you.. I do see another link.. https://soundcloud.com/alexadsaster
I got to be there though.. I’ve got to proof you wrong! Where is this party again? Any info?
Unanimous fortune teller: let me see… Ah yes.. Gifgrond… Check www.gifgrond.nl
Okay, I will and I will come! That’s a party nobody who knows about the future would want to miss out on.. It would be stupid to miss it with the pre knowledge that your bowl had given us.. Any more stuff? Is there something good coming my way? Or perhaps something excellent happening in the life of the readers?
Unanimous fortune teller: … Hmm.. Let me see… I dive deeper in the bowl… I see a half moon… A venue named half moon… Half moon in Putney.. England..
Interesting… What about it?
Unanimous fortune teller: it’s the 7th of October.. 2015… London.. I see a person… A wonderful person…
That must be me than…
Unanimous fortune teller: hmm.. It’s a girl.. She is playing… Music… She sings too.. I can see her mouth opening and closing.. She does it passionately… I can see that she plays new songs.. It looks very happy and refreshing… I can see it will be magical!
Who is she?
Unanimous fortune teller: Bloom… Her name is Bloom… Wonderful.. You don’t want to miss it..
Is that not the whole point of looking at the future? Am I there? Am I actually there?
Unanimous fortune teller: hmm let me see… I see a boy…
Unanimous fortune teller: much younger than you… I see another one.. They look similar… They look like brothers… Let me see… Aren’t these the Orzel brothers from Pacific?I see two more, who are no brothers but still good friends… Drums guitar bass they are playing together… Making a show… Performing… I see a hamster in a corner… Hopelessly in love…
That hamster must be Spicki Lee Jones.. That’s the only hamster that I know..
But where am I in this? Or the reader at home? Are we there?
Unanimous fortune teller: hmm… I can’t tell.. You might or might not be there.. The reader might be or might not be there… It’s becoming blurry again.. Sorry… I can just vaguely see a link to the event https://www.facebook.com/events/921207331294396/
You are a shit fortune teller really, so far no word about fortune… Can you do it one more time & this time focus on me? Where I am in the future?
Unanimous fortune teller: hmm… I see an event… An online event… You are releasing a free release… A new label… Something with a dog… It’s 14 October.. A Wednesday… You will have an album out for free on Dog Park Records…
Unanimous fortune teller: yep, you’ll give it away for free.. No fortunes for you mate. Not next month at least.. I do see an online link… https://www.facebook.com/events/712172605582588/
Well… Okay.. Thank you for seeing the future. Now I think it’s best to use the present time to travel to these events so we can to be in the future and have a good time even if we will still be in the present. So confusing! Don’t you have a headache?
Unanimous fortune teller: in half an hour I will have a headache.
Thank you for your concern.
Thank you for visiting the future teller! Maybe a better fortune teller to be found at the bank ;D
And besides the party parties: yay for looking forward to chickenbark! Wroopòòòk!! Listening to your dog now ;-D