steel:::plate – larval:::colonization EP

If we could get a peak behind this stuff in the reddish-brown album art for the larval:::colonization EP, by steel:::plate, I'm sure we'd find a colony of disgusting larvae. Or, who knows, maybe they'd be not disgusting. Maybe they'd be cute.

If we could get a peak behind this thing in the reddish-brown album art for the larval:::colonization EP, by steel:::plate, I’m sure we’d find a colony of disgusting larvae. Or, who knows, maybe they’d be not disgusting. Maybe they’d be cute. Probably not.

Artist: steel:::plate
Title: larval:::colonization EP
Label: Noise-Joy
Cat#: NJMP3-0384
Keywords: Noise
Reviewer: alex:::spalding

I really hope that we, as a species, discover some really cool science stuff while I’m still around to see it… a major breakthrough or two, some real “paradigm” “shifting”… shit like that. In the meantime, I’ll be hanging around this weird-butt corner of the web writing about exciting musics of the past, present, and future. But, trust me, once that wild wave of science hits, I’m gonna have to pop over to the lab for some keynote speaking and probably a few petri examinations. Catering, too, mostly. That is, unless we’re shrunk down to the microscopic level and forced to deal with several species of creepy insects ravenous for our micro-human flesh, but what are the chances that would happen, right? Very slim, presumably.

Anyway, onward to what we’re really here to talk about today… steel:::plate was the project of Farris Salvatore, and this was the only album of sounds I ever received from them, for release at Noise-Joy. It’s good… but, is it great? Well, we’re about to find out!
Spoiler Alert: the answer is yeah!

(Keep reading, though, please!)

Before we start, I really need to set this baseball I’m always carrying down somewhere. Perhaps I’ll just place it here, upon this very large button, on a not-at-all innocuous looking science machine of some sort. Wouldn’t it be funny if this were a shrink ray? I mean, we were just talking about that a couple paragraphs ago, so I thought that might be a mildly humorous coincidence to consider in a very detached manner. Don’t worry, those chances were presumed to be very slim. Surely, now, they’re close to none! So, here we go, baseball, right on the button, and– NOOOO!!!

Damn, damn, damn… we’ve been shrunk! I should have known, there’s no such thing as a slim chance where imagination is concerned. I really fucked myself there. We may as well review the album, though, I guess.

The first track is ‘harmonic:::fracture’. I feel like I’m hearing a pile of creepy steel insects. They’ve got malicious intent, I can just tell. They’re not gonna lay there munching on dust mites together, they’re in the mood for something more raw. They’re squirming, squabbling with each other over lumpen bits of flesh. So gross! If you don’t mind, please go in the room and tell them not to eat me. Take the huge can of bug spray, and if they give you any trouble, try to roll it at them and lock the door. The noises these things make are so alien and horrible. They are definitely plotting something terrible against us. Mean, alien bugs, made of malleable metals.

As this continues, number two is the titular ‘larval:::colonization’. It feels springy, but sharp. Not Cheddar sharp… more like serrated knife sharp. There’s a fair amount of squishiness here, burbling. Imagine a big foamy bubble bath, except it’s all highly corrosive acids and only semi-liquid. There is this subcutaneous frequency, an evil robotic mosquito henchman, squirting total nast upon us.

‘quartz:::pulse’ is very short, and made up of similar stuff as the last two, but with a kind of percussive, clipping groove inserted, warbling in the mix. Very strange. Ends with a choir of tin crickets.

‘magneto:::sphere’ is last, and feels like we are now surrounded by deadly blades of grass and grotesque grubs. The chatter of insect life. There is a garbled, mechanically imitative tête–à–tête between the grub and some kind of angry grasshopper. Most likely, they are discussing who’s allowed to eat us, in that entirely disgusting way bugs like to devour things. With mandibles, and digestive fluid expulsions. No thanks, bug dudes, we’re outta here.

Anyway, despite the near-constant threat of becoming some dumb bug’s next meal, this was music to my ears! If you’re ready to resume your preferred height and also listen to some strange music, just click the link down below: 😉

https://archive.org/details/Steelplate-LarvalcolonizationEp

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