tite: BLACK & BLUE A CAPELLA VERSION
artist: Backstreet Boys w/ vocals provided by Earwig Deluxe
tags: better, than, the, original, alternative, boy, band, experimental, solo, voice, vocal, improvisation, Knoxville, definitely, not, using, manipulation, to, maybe, get, hits, this, is, probably, going, to, get, taken, down, and, soon, don’t, blame, me, that’s, just, a, forecast, i, swear, and, it, shouldn’t, be, unexpected, really, like, i’m, just, pointing, out, the, obvious, here
Something seems amiss my friends. Something is most definitely up (and it’s not just my boner from listening to Shape of My Heart, it’s not my fault those were some sensuous tones that stirred within me a whirlwind of passion that may not be entirely stopped unless it hits that cold front), but I don’t quite know what. All I do know is that we have been graced with one of the all time wowee bowee holy shit and take it away from me I don’t need to eat anymore finds, we have a cappella version of one of the hottest albums in the year of our Lard 2000. Lard 2000 sounds fancy. Like, future lard. The possibilities are endless. Well, they have an end alright. At 2000. What ends you ask? Lard. Guess it’s rather limited. Until you start asking how you get to 2000. Looks like we’re back in the future buddy.
Anyways, before I got sidetracked, this is a cappella version of one of the hottests albums in the year of our Lard 2000, by none other than the male humans too young to be called men of the rear roadways. Something tells me Lard 2000 takes the rear roadways in the future.
I kinda just want to slide a greasy hand against this persons head in congratulations for such a masterpiece. It will be grease from my own head because it is a nice thing to do. It is a very greasy part of my body. One might wonder why I wouldn’t want to just go for the direct application of grease in a head on head rubbing meltdown come together of the century but well, I want the usage of an applicator. It gives it a bit better ritual feel, so it feels more important. You know, I’m imparting something onto this wise entity, rather than just rubbin grease together. Classy. Run a respectful joint here.
This rendition speaks to my soul. It’s holy crap. We’ve gone up to 2002. If Goat is the master of the universe, how can it be stolen? Checkmate Battery Bunyuns. Oh shit. That’s not what they’re called is it? It’s Backstreet Boys. Ok, my bad. That was real time folks. Ah, stupidity.
But yeah! What a way for it to make it out into the world! Only just some
You ever think that like, people are slated to be famous and stuff, and that there was nothing that could have pried them from that fate? I feel like that’s a thing right now. Which is a fucking shame because that sure as shit ain’t me. It might be you though! So, in that case, I am happy. Someone’s gotta get the leg up. But don’t raise it too high. We don’t need a full view. (What?)
Truth be told I was hoping that this was going to have like some sort of nugget of goodness in it but not really. I even checked out their other stuff and it is ABSOLUTE GARBAGE.
Personally, I like it when the powers that be don’t point their nose down my way, even in a sneering appreciation of cleverness kind of way because either way they’re still looking. And you get your cheap laugh and your two seconds of fame but still hoofin down the scraps of fat from the liposuction tube (ok I am having a real hard time trying to word this properly, so here goes an entirely too long explanation: what I’m trying to say is that they eat human fat, from a bin, or whatever receptacle it is put in, and the best place for this is a surgery place, hospital maybe, and the surgery is liposuction. Would it just be fair to say the medical waste after liposuction? I felt there was a much better way to explain myself with words here but for the life of me the flow just isn’t coming. Well, anyways, thanks for that.), I think we are a little lost now.
Kinda wish I had a banana right about now. Sounds pretty good. I’m getting a slight headache reading about all the legal jargon regarding contracts and record labels and what not so before a blood vessel bursts in my brain and I die from a stroke I’ll just post the link to this piece and call it a day and forget about all the other stuff.
Ya know what. I’m a tad angry now. I’m calling this shit. What in gods name is this? What was the point? What the fuck were you doing? This isn’t even clever. Like, it’s just shit. Utter. Shit. It was going to be drivel to begin with. But then another interloper appears and says why not. Yeah but still, fuck it. Fuck it to a million pieces.