Is it Christmas? Did I sleep for a thousand years and now it is that time of the year? It does clear up why there is everywhere a firm amount of flickering lights, the smell of freshly chopped trees and the sad sound of never dying Christmas hits from the year zero popping out at every street corner. Oh no! Where to hide! Can Santa quickly deliver me a bit of wool and a needle so I can poke my eyes out and sew my ears shut?
As you can certainly see the Christmas spirit already got to me, ready to walk me down the gallows to hang myself up by the balls like a creative and let’s say alternative Christmas decoration. But as I walked slowly to my end of suffering something different came to my ear.. the bells of a sleigh? A tune I knew but all screwed up? There he was, it was Santa Himself hitting me with the bells on my head! Ho ho ho! Trying to kill yourself, aye? With his eyes full of laughter and a belly fat of strange movements he picked me up and tossed me in the sleigh next to him! Look friend’ he said! We are here not to give you or anyone a hard time, we are hear to bring joy to the world! A world that also you like, love and support! Said the wisecracking Santa like he was the real life bunch of Christmas spirits all in one.
He pointed with his fat fingers over the land as the sleigh slipped through the sky by the horsepowers of a bunch of hardworking dears. I stared and saw Wormhole World, completely piled up with laughing and smiling inhabitants, waving warm to me and Santa as we flew by… Ho ho ho santa said as he tossed down multiple free copies of more ‘joy to the wormhole world’. Normally you would think that throwing anything from this height would have been disastrous for the music gifts, but strangely these bits of joy are being delivered to safety by flying pyjamas! I couldn’t believe my eyes, yet here I was seeing the phenomenon as I sat next to Coca-Cola’s marketing invention in a flying sleigh. And as the overweighted Santa kept smiling and laughing as he said Ho Ho Ho, I couldn’t help to get infected by it. Also the joys of happiness as people downstairs took not only the joy but also the flying pyjamas as their gifts with great pleasure was doing something to my bitter state of irony. I started to laugh and said Ho Ho Ho too as we flew around delivering more happiness!
Me and Santa going to be great palls, it’s only for one night, right? Pretty sure I could flip him out of the carriage if it really becomes too nice, but somehow something had broken in me. The ice of my heart had melted too, maybe it was that moment that Santa have me a few of those flying pyjamas to toss down myself. It really elevates to give happiness and joy away for free .. here… I see you reader! You want some too? Go and catch it before I turn full scrooge again! Ho Ho Ho!
Me and Santa became great palls, especially when we chatted and laughed about how one of his deers kept falling over itd own legs. Santa explained that this was due to the deer being so afraid of heights that he was doomed to a drastic case of alcoholism. But he did have a cure to get the little hooves in control and away from the bottles of whisky. He pulled out two wonderful boxes, presents are they mostly called in this time of the year and gave me one to open as he handed the other one to the alcoholic red nosed deer. I always like the sound of unwrapping gifts, but Santa told me that I would dig the sounds inside way much more. Oh my goodness, no wonder that this would bring the mind of the deer at ease! These had been nothing less than volume one and volume two of A Very Danish Paulstretch Christmas by Steffi Starshine!
Even though I usually hide out in a cave until the festive season had passed by, this somehow secretly had my interest so much that I had doubts of this years grumpiness. Now, high above the many chimneys of houses with many Christmas stockings to be filled i felt thrilled and super excited to have received these gifts! Santa said after his trademark Ho Ho Ho that he too had been delighted with Seffi Starshine making these stretched out Danish Christmas anthems, as for reasons I certainly understand, he too was sick of the usual Christmas songs that are mandatory played to death every year on each and every radio. This, was so so so much better! Santa listened, Rudolf (the alcoholic deer) listened, me and the other deers listened and we flew higher and higher while deciding which household deserved such music gift? It didn’t take too long of Santa decided that the answer was all of them, but especially you, dear wonderful reader, as these ambient works contain the true christmas spirit, fulfilling even the biggest hater with a heart full of calm tolerable joy, melting the iciest of spirits the danish Paulstretch Christmas way! Santa pulled two fresh presents containing ‘you-know-what’ and sticking it at your face, ready to grab the joyful sounds of a delightful season straight from the Ho Ho Ho addicted man himself!
Me, Santa and all the deers flew and flew until we realized it wasn’t even Christmas yet! We laughed and cheered and you can say Ho Ho Ho all you want, but with music as good as a very Danish Paulstretch Christmas and Joy to the Wormhole World you simply cant stop the Christmas spirit!