I Get HIV On Television – Phase Praise EP (EPH073)

I Get HIV On Television - Phase Praise EP

The album art for Phase Praise EP by I Get HIV On Television tells a story: A tv man and a dog went for a walk through the woods. Then they went upside-down. It was best story ever. The End!

Artist: I Get HIV On Television
Title: Phase Praise EP
Label: Ephedrina
Cat#: EPH073
Keywords: Breakbeat, IDM, Experimental, Ambient Breaks
Reviewer: Alex Spalding

Do you ever hear a word like ‘transducer’ and think to yourself, “hey, did somebody just make that up?” and then you remember, no, it’s a real word. They’ve even got the Oxford saying it. But what the fuck is that? “Beyond duce!” I have ascended, Il Duce!

It’s like… “hey, are you droppin’ a deuce!?” “Nah, I’m transdeucin’ bro! I am way beyond that shit.”

Hello, and welcome to another wonderful, fantastic, ultra-deluxe, rainbow sparkly review! This time it’s for a thing… a musical thing… oh, an album, that’s what I’m trying to say! It’s by I Get HIV On Television. Television… is that even a word? Tele… vision… ??? (but, who would want that?)

To be honest, this album gave me the shits. Good shits, but shits nonetheless. Sometimes shits are welcome. You could say, metaphysically, spiritually, supranaturally, that… my whole life before hearing this album was like a period of deep audiological constipation, and now… there’s just no holding back! I can feel these sounds running down my leg like another word that may just as well be utter gibberish: diarrhea. Every time I see that word, just the look of it, my mind thinks of refined gemstones, jewels, things of that manner — but it is not that, not even close. I don’t why that is… I try to trace the thought-stream… diamonds, rhinestones, Rhea Perlman, pearls, diarrhea… I just don’t know.

It’s late… I’m rambling…

… the first track on this album is titled ‘Intro SL’. Wow, right away, some pretty fret tones in a small room, some other interesting noises happening to really amp up the electricity in the air! Reverse-plinks, all kinds of lovely vibes. This is a very nice way to start an album.

Next is ‘Fall’, a disoriented kick drum and some ambiguous noises, some low, smooth bass. Tamborine in a vacuumpack. Some very strung out piano in the dark. Breakbeat… frog throats. I’m in a swampy soup, a bubbling cauldron. Ouch! Suddenly a sharp frequency! And more of them! I love the bass, it’s fretless and seems compressed, and in the subs.

‘Inverno’ is like toy machine gun fire, some claps, a nice little fusion shuffle rhythm comes in. Very weird bass on this, then some fantastic chillpads, this is like… highly experimental ambient breakbeat music. Completely mesmerizing. It goes uptempo for a brief span of time, before returning to this… sort of arhythmic, shuffling, confusing-but-familiar array of sounds. Those splashes of cymbals are nice, like pouring buckets of ice water into pools of molten lava.

There’s a sort of pump-groove, more uptempo and playful on ‘Landscape’. Not certain of what kind of landscape this is meant to evoke, if any, because all I’m seeing is a dark club with spinning lights, filled with robots. The whole mix is done dark and very intensely filtered into low mid-range frequencies. There’s a bit of distortion as a result, but it’s interesting, the effect it all has on your brain.

‘To The Sun’ takes us… where else, but to the sun? I don’t know, maybe anyplace else but there, actually. This music could be a billiard hall on Jupiter. It feels like I’m traveling at the speed of sound to these clipped micro-rhythms with their intense, focused programming and detail-attention, as they throb with filtering. The bass pops, lifts. I’m probably still on Earth, actually. Circling, haven’t quite landed. I hear what sound like spacy choirs underneath it all, kind of shimmering there.

Very experimental voyage I’ve just been on! Voyage… voy… ah, nevermind. These words elude me again, until next time! Meanwhile, feast your ears on this EP:


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